#BEST OF GEORGE CARLIN YOUTUBE FREE#
Excerpted with permission by Free Press, a Division of Simon & Schuster, Inc. Staying conceived literally required a miracle.Įxcerpted from Last Words by George Carlin with Tony Hendra.
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This marriage had gone south long before. So while I sprang from something good and positive, by the time I showed up I was a distinct inconvenience. According to those who knew them they were one of the great pairings of all time. The two of them were crazy about one another.
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Their reconciliations were sudden because my father had a terrific line of bullshit. My mother's theory was that while my father had been very free with his hands where his first family and Patrick were concerned, he didn't abuse her, because she had four brothers and her dad was a policeman. (My older brother, Patrick, can't say the same.) His first marriage ended disastrously when his first wife died of a heart attack not long after one of his beatings. My mother told me that my father hit her only once. The separations were long because my father had trouble metabolizing alcohol. In fact the preceding six years of my parents' marriage had consisted entirely of long separations, punctuated by sudden brief reconciliations and occasional sex-fests. The odds against my future existence were even longer: this particular weekend was a single isolated sex-fest during a marital separation that had lasted more than a year. By the time my father's eager, whiskey-fueled sperm forced its way into my mother's egg-of-the-month club, she was forty and he was forty-eight - certainly old enough to be carrying rubbers. Not that my conception was the tale of two young lovers, carried away by passion and strong wine. But we must admit that Irish foreplay consists of little more than "You awake?" Or the more caring, sensitive "Brace yourself, Agnes!"
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and go on to say that he was a disinformation agent for the Illuminati Dumbest video Ive seen in a while. Popular ethnic slurs to the contrary, the Irish do enjoy sex - at least the last ten seconds or so. A clip of George Carlin saying 5 words out of context and put it on repeat- and then insinuate that hes part of the 'big club' referencing his material about the 'owners of this country' in his 2005 HBO Life is worth Losing. Meanwhile at Curley's Hotel on Beach 116th Street, Mary and Patrick Carlin starred in yet another doomed Catholic remake of Rhythm in the Sack.įor several generations Rockaway Beach had been a favorite weekend retreat for New York's alcohol-crazed Irish youth in search of sex and sun. High humidity and temperatures in the 90s send millions to the beaches."Īt the Paramount Theater in Times Square, Bing Crosby and Frances Farmer starred in Rhythm on the Range. A headline in that Saturday's New York Post said "Hot, sticky, rainy weekend begins. I was conceived in a damp, sand-flecked room of Curley's Hotel in Rockaway Beach, New York.